Geekzone: technology news, blogs, forums
Guest
Welcome Guest.
You haven't logged in yet. If you don't have an account you can register now.
Buying anything on Amazon? Please use the Geekzone Amazon aff link.


View this topic in a long page with up to 500 replies per page Create new topic
1 | ... | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 
9 posts

Wannabe Geek


  Reply # 579448 9-Feb-2012 20:38 Send private message

NokiaRocks: One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

9 posts

Wannabe Geek


  Reply # 579450 9-Feb-2012 20:39 Send private message

Lol someone tell me how to use this thing!!! Sorry, noob being noob here

83 posts

Master Geek
+1 received by user: 1


  Reply # 579454 9-Feb-2012 20:42

Whats the worst thing about farming dildos?

Squatters.

xpd

GTA5 Nut
6435 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 361

Mod Emeritus
Trusted
Subscriber

  Reply # 585572 23-Feb-2012 10:14 Send private message

At a wedding reception recently someone yelled,
"All the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your
life worth living."


The bartender was nearly crushed to death.




XPD / @DemiseNZ / Gavin
 
Check out "Like A Storm" - Official Site

GPKC GTA5 Crew - Fun, social, NZ based

Corsair Carbide SPEC-02 / Corsair VS550 / G.SKILL Ripjaws X 8GB / ASUS 260X / ASUS H81M-E / Intel Pentium K Anniversay G3258



819 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 178


  Reply # 688938 20-Sep-2012 16:51 Send private message

So Prince Charles & Camilla are touring NZ, and during the tour, they have a royal visit with the Maori King at Turangawaewae. Charles and the King have been through the formal part of the proceedings and are chatting in a quiet moment.

The King is curious about the hat that Charles is wearing; its like a Davy Crockett coonskin cap, with the tail hanging down and all, but its made from fox fur.   So he says to Charles, "Hey, Charlie, cuz, what's with the funny-looking hat, bro?"

Prince Charles replies, "Well, you see, I was on the telephone this morning to Mummy, and I said to her, "Mummy, today I'm going to Ingarooare-waaheah to see the Maori King", and she said to me, "Oh, Ingarooare-waaheah, wear the fox hat.""

7201 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 537

Trusted
Subscriber

  Reply # 707302 27-Oct-2012 08:42 Send private message

A father buys a lie-detector robot that slaps people when they lie.

He decides to test it out at dinner one night.
The father asks his son what he did that day.
The son says, "I did some homework." The robot slaps the son.
The son says, "OK, I was at a friend's house watching movies."
Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"
Son says, "Toy Story." The robot slaps the son again.
Son says, "OK! OK! We were watching porn!"
Dad says, "What?? At your age I didn't even know what porn was!" The robot slaps the father.
Mum laughs and says, "Well, he certainly is your son!" The robot slaps the mother.

P.S.: Robot for sale




Asus eee pad transformer
iPod 2G
Windows 7 PC
Lots and lots of Nikon camera gear

1 | ... | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 
View this topic in a long page with up to 500 replies per page Create new topic




Twitter »
Follow us to receive Twitter updates when new discussions are posted in our forums:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when news items and blogs are posted in our frontpage:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when tech item prices are listed in our price comparison site:





Trending now »

Hot discussions in our forums right now:

Netflix officialy launching in NZ in March
Created by jarj, last reply by tdgeek on 21-Nov-2014 19:08 (97 replies)
Pages... 5 6 7


Gull Employment Dispute.
Created by networkn, last reply by Geektastic on 22-Nov-2014 17:30 (61 replies)
Pages... 3 4 5


Which one is right for me? M8, Z3, S5 or other?
Created by makiomoto, last reply by makiomoto on 20-Nov-2014 13:52 (40 replies)
Pages... 2 3


Slingshot line speed
Created by Frankiej45, last reply by Frankiej45 on 20-Nov-2014 14:38 (14 replies)

Chief Censor - He's at it again!
Created by scuwp, last reply by Nebbie on 19-Nov-2014 16:23 (42 replies)
Pages... 2 3


Little Wins labour Leadership
Created by MikeAqua, last reply by Aredwood on 21-Nov-2014 18:47 (53 replies)
Pages... 2 3 4


Orcon: Why did you cancel my email account without telling me??
Created by old3eyes, last reply by old3eyes on 21-Nov-2014 17:03 (13 replies)

Council recycling.....
Created by xpd, last reply by richms on 19-Nov-2014 17:17 (27 replies)
Pages... 2



Geekzone Live »

Try automatic live updates from Geekzone directly in your browser, without refreshing the page, with Geekzone Live now.

Are you subscribed to our RSS feed? You can download the latest headlines and summaries from our stories directly to your computer or smartphone by using a feed reader.

Alternatively, you can receive a daily email with Geekzone updates.