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7 posts

Wannabe Geek


# 161752 18-Jan-2015 20:33
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Hi guys - awkward off-topic question incoming!

My partner and I have built a wonderful life together over the past decade and, like many couples, we would love nothing more than to complete our little family by having a baby of our own. We have plans and dreams for the future, all of which will be enriched by doing it as a family.

Our child would have a wonderful life filled with animals, adventure, hobbies, technology and music. They will grow up surrounded by people who love and support them. Unfortunately, as a same-sex couple, having a baby will be more challenging for us than it might be for other couples. The assistance of a sperm donor will mean that we can finally be parents. We are on the waiting list at Fertility Associates, but it’s a long list – at least 18 months. Would you, or someone you know, be willing to be our donor?

We think what a sperm donor is prepared to do is amazing, and words alone cannot begin to encompass the enormity of their gift. Although we prefer to remain non-identifiable, we are willing to have a meeting with the donor if they wish, and would be more than happy to provide the donor with an update on our successful pregnancy and a photo of our new baby, if they would like that. Our child will be brought up knowing their special origins, and will always know how grateful we are to the man who helped us create them. If you have read this far you may be our donor! If you are a fit healthy guy aged 18-45, and you might consider helping to make our dream a reality, please contact our donor co-ordinator Jenny at Fertility Associates, and quote our reference: GROVE

Ph 09 925 5938 or email donorsperm@fertilityassociates.co.nz for more details – you don’t have to decide anything on the spot, she will answer any questions you may have. Thank you for the amazing gift of parenthood you are contemplating!

Hopefully this doesn't breach any kind of forum rules, not sure. If it does, apologies!

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  # 1217142 18-Jan-2015 21:10
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Um, don't you have any male friends that might be able to help out?




Whatifthespacekeyhadneverbeeninvented?




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Wannabe Geek


  # 1217144 18-Jan-2015 21:25
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No. That would be amazing, but we don't really have any guy friends we know that well. It's a pretty awkward thing to bring up. Its not like asking for a ride home or something.

We thought we'd just pop along to Fertility Associates and it would all be sweet, but there's a massive waiting list - who knew there was such a shortage?

We're struggling really, to think where to advertise.

 
 
 
 


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  # 1217147 18-Jan-2015 21:35
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My sister-in-law is in a similar situation with her partner (lesbian couple), one possible solution suggested to them was for the donor to be the brother of my sister-in-laws partner, that way there is a little bit of her partners family DNA in the mix!
They were going via FA in Auckland as well, but I think they are now looking at using an Australian company due to the long waits and more limited choice here in NZ.

Good luck!

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  # 1217157 18-Jan-2015 21:54
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Have you considered adopting? There are lots of ready made humans needing families.





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  # 1217177 18-Jan-2015 22:12
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Geektastic: Have you considered adopting? There are lots of ready made humans needing families.


Really?  I thought waiting lists for adoption were extremely long as well.


PS tongue-out shouldn't this thread be in Offers & Wanted?.




"I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road." -  Stephen Hawking


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  # 1217182 18-Jan-2015 22:18
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BDFL - Memuneh
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  # 1217184 18-Jan-2015 22:21
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  # 1217188 18-Jan-2015 22:27
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whatarethey: ... but there's a massive waiting list - who knew there was such a shortage?

...


Would it be inappropriate to make a joke about queuing at 'the bank' being so last century.wink




"I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road." -  Stephen Hawking


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# 1217189 18-Jan-2015 22:33
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Paging JohnR,

Paging JohnR,

Paging JohnR...





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  # 1217196 18-Jan-2015 22:45

Being a sperm donor is something I might just consider. As I don't see myself ever getting into a long term relationship due to the stupid relationship property laws. Although I would have to do some research into the laws to do with child support. To make sure I wouldn't be be liable in that respect.

Although I agree with DathKermit, Surely you would have some male friends that you would at least know you better than everyone on GZ.





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  # 1217198 18-Jan-2015 22:48
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Aredwood: Being a sperm donor is something I might just consider. As I don't see myself ever getting into a long term relationship due to the stupid relationship property laws. Although I would have to do some research into the laws to do with child support. To make sure I wouldn't be be liable in that respect.

Although I agree with DathKermit, Surely you would have some male friends that you would at least know you better than everyone on GZ.


Contracts written by lawyers can override these laws can't they? eg a Prenupt type of arrangement. 

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  # 1217201 18-Jan-2015 22:49
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floydbloke:
Geektastic: Have you considered adopting? There are lots of ready made humans needing families.


Really?  I thought waiting lists for adoption for extremely long as well.


PS tongue-out shouldn't this thread be in Offers & Wanted?.


Angelina Jolie never seems to have to wait long....





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  # 1217205 18-Jan-2015 22:57
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Geektastic:
floydbloke:
Geektastic: Have you considered adopting? There are lots of ready made humans needing families.


Really?  I thought waiting lists for adoption for extremely long as well.


PS tongue-out shouldn't this thread be in Offers & Wanted?.


Angelina Jolie never seems to have to wait long....


Quite true...but she has more substantial assets than most.




"I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road." -  Stephen Hawking


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  # 1217215 18-Jan-2015 23:22
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mattwnz:
Aredwood: Being a sperm donor is something I might just consider. As I don't see myself ever getting into a long term relationship due to the stupid relationship property laws. Although I would have to do some research into the laws to do with child support. To make sure I wouldn't be be liable in that respect.

Although I agree with DathKermit, Surely you would have some male friends that you would at least know you better than everyone on GZ.


Contracts written by lawyers can override these laws can't they? eg a Prenupt type of arrangement. 


yes you can contract out of the Relationship Properties Act, but good luck bringing up that discussion with your SO

http://www.legislation.govt.nz/act/public/1976/0166/latest/DLM441364.html

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  # 1217216 18-Jan-2015 23:24
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nathan:
mattwnz:
Aredwood: Being a sperm donor is something I might just consider. As I don't see myself ever getting into a long term relationship due to the stupid relationship property laws. Although I would have to do some research into the laws to do with child support. To make sure I wouldn't be be liable in that respect.

Although I agree with DathKermit, Surely you would have some male friends that you would at least know you better than everyone on GZ.


Contracts written by lawyers can override these laws can't they? eg a Prenupt type of arrangement. 


yes you can contract out of the Relationship Properties Act, but good luck bringing up that discussion with your SO

http://www.legislation.govt.nz/act/public/1976/0166/latest/DLM441364.html


Depends on the person I guess. I think as you get older, people are more accepting of it, as they have built up more assets. It also protects both sides. There are very high odds of a relationship failing unfortunately, and people insure themselves against far less risky things. When you are young, you often don't have any significant assets, and student loans,  so a prenuptial type of agreeement doesn't really matter .

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