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4320 posts

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  # 1370955 20-Aug-2015 16:29
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i made an anonymous account to see if i could see anyone I knew ha ha. 

I don't get why anyone would put photos of themselves on such a site. 

Tauranga is a small place. 

I checked the data dump, my email was there too so looks legit. 



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Ultimate Geek
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  # 1371197 20-Aug-2015 21:30
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JWR:
Presso: You can search email address database here.

https://ashley.cynic.al/


I'd advise against giving your email to a site like this.


Rather use this one.

www.trustify.info/check


 
 
 
 


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  # 1371505 21-Aug-2015 12:00
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I'm not happy with the apparently widespread glee about the leak of personal details from that site, that glee justified by moral judgement / condemnation of those who are going to get their water cut off (and worse) for doing something perfectly legal.  I'd certainly never betray a partner by doing something like that, but neither would I betray someone I knew - or even a stranger - by "outing" them for doing something - even if I thought what they did was morally repugnant, unless what they were doing was going to cause harm to others greater than the harm that would result from exposing them.  It's difficult - get far enough through life, and it's kind of inevitable that such issues with friends, colleagues, family etc will crop up.  Good people do very dumb things.  
Vigilante action to punish/shame people for doing dumb "morally questionable" but legal things isn't good, much of the glee being expressed smacks of the kind of smutty twittering voyeurism/titillation long ago sought by buyers of "Truth" newspaper who'd pour over the lists of divorce proceedings in the days when being divorced incurred significant stigma, and to get a divorce required some evidence of infidelity to be proved or admitted.  Except this is worse.

It looks to me like some kind of mass symbolic / metaphorical "stoning to death" of individuals who crossed a moral line, the likely consequences to those "exposed" might not be as harsh/final as being buried in the ground and pelted to death by your peers - but it's actually not that far removed from exactly that.  Lives will be destroyed.  There's absolutely nothing good going on here at all.

... with one possible exception:  exposing hypocrites from the "Moral Right", but even then the collateral damage isn't worth it.



Mad Scientist
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  # 1371507 21-Aug-2015 12:01
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Hmm ... Can't disagree ...




Involuntary autocorrect in operation on mobile device. Apologies in advance.


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Ultimate Geek
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  # 1371522 21-Aug-2015 12:19
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If you caught out being immoral in your relationship, how on earth can you expect your spouse and others to act morally right towards you?

Just a thought ;-)



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  # 1371523 21-Aug-2015 12:19
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Whilst I don't disagree with Fred99, I suggest that the damage is being done not by revealing the infidelity, but by the infidelity itself.

But I'm certainly not going to agree with the presumption that whatever is legal is OK, and that therefore nothing should be done. Lot's of legal things shouldn't be allowed, and many illegal things should. IMHO. But show some reasonable tolerance.


 
 
 
 


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  # 1371556 21-Aug-2015 13:06
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frankv: Whilst I don't disagree with Fred99, I suggest that the damage is being done not by revealing the infidelity, but by the infidelity itself.

But I'm certainly not going to agree with the presumption that whatever is legal is OK, and that therefore nothing should be done. Lot's of legal things shouldn't be allowed, and many illegal things should. IMHO. But show some reasonable tolerance.



Oh - I absolutely disagree with you here, but please don't take offense.
I absolutely do not endorse infidelity, but in this case the "punishment" (public exposure) far outweighs the "crime" (moral transgression).  People do have issues with fidelity - it's very very common. Many manage to work through it one way or another, in private, perhaps with support from close friends/family or counselors .  Throwing it out there in public probably sabotaged any chance of that ever happening.  It was a very very evil thing to do.

As for not agreeing that "whatever is legal is ok... and nothing should be done", and "lots of legal things shouldn't be allowed", then we seem to have even more disagreement at a fundamental level.
I am going to presume that if it's not illegal, then it's OK - or at least it is unless it causes real harm to some other individual or group in which case legislators need to step in and take a look.  When I say "OK", then I mean accept that it's none of my business, doesn't affect me - keep my sticky beak out, and expect that other people, as well as law makers and enforcers should do exactly the same.
In this case - it's none of your business what these people have done.

Perhaps the most hypocritical of all when it comes to moral judgement are some conservative Christians.  I'm an atheist now of course, but had a strong Christian upbringing - enough to understand that Jesus led by example, and from my recollection of his teachings, he'd have never taken any glee from what happened here, and would have done everything he could to support those who are being condemned.

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  # 1371572 21-Aug-2015 13:15
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I find it very hard to care to be either for or against, for me there are many bigger concerns to apply my energy to. Posting in this thread pushes my interest and ironically counters my earlier statement about being disinterested, Oh well, now what coffee shall I have.




Mike
Retired IT Manager. 
The views stated in my posts are my personal views and not that of any other organisation.

 

Using empathy takes no energy and can gain so much. Try it.

 

 


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# 1371580 21-Aug-2015 13:27
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MikeB4: I find it very hard to care to be either for or against, for me there are many bigger concerns to apply my energy to. Posting in this thread pushes my interest and ironically counters my earlier statement about being disinterested, Oh well, now what coffee shall I have.


Ask your wife to make the coffee.  Tell her you're too busy to make it yourself, as you're discussing infidelity with strangers on an internet forum.
 cool

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  # 1371582 21-Aug-2015 13:28
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I wonder if the email addresses from the AM dump will start to show up on google searches - for example when a prospective employer does a background search.
Somebody's marital issues may not be any business of an employer, but use of such a site is possibly indicative of a dishonesty that employers might not be impressed by.

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Ultimate Geek
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  # 1371584 21-Aug-2015 13:33
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Fred99:

I absolutely do not endorse infidelity, but in this case the "punishment" (public exposure) far outweighs the "crime" (moral transgression).  People do have issues with fidelity - it's very very common. Many manage to work through it one way or another, in private, perhaps with support from close friends/family or counselors .  Throwing it out there in public probably sabotaged any chance of that ever happening.  It was a very very evil thing to do.


Can't say I agree with you one bit.
Infidelity is the bigger evil here. And while I don't support what has happened and the way at how these people are being exposed. They only have themselves to blame. 

Fred99: As for not agreeing that "whatever is legal is ok... and nothing should be done", and "lots of legal things shouldn't be allowed", then we seem to have even more disagreement at a fundamental level.
I am going to presume that if it's not illegal, then it's OK - or at least it is unless it causes real harm to some other individual or group in which case legislators need to step in and take a look.  When I say "OK", then I mean accept that it's none of my business, doesn't affect me - keep my sticky beak out, and expect that other people, as well as law makers and enforcers should do exactly the same.
In this case - it's none of your business what these people have done.


Agree. None of our business. But the families and children involved are the real victims, lets not forget that.  So instead of going about at how bad it is for the person "being exposed", maybe consider that there are others out there who are maybe just a little more affected. 

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  # 1371636 21-Aug-2015 14:54
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DizzyD:
Fred99:

I absolutely do not endorse infidelity, but in this case the "punishment" (public exposure) far outweighs the "crime" (moral transgression).  People do have issues with fidelity - it's very very common. Many manage to work through it one way or another, in private, perhaps with support from close friends/family or counselors .  Throwing it out there in public probably sabotaged any chance of that ever happening.  It was a very very evil thing to do.


Can't say I agree with you one bit.
Infidelity is the bigger evil here. And while I don't support what has happened and the way at how these people are being exposed. They only have themselves to blame. 



OK - I think we disagree on definition of what's "morally wrong" and what defines true "evil".

I'm old enough to know that infidelity happens far more commonly than many younger people would care to expect, perhaps none more so than young lovebirds with expectation of fairy tale futures of wedded bliss until death do (they) part.  Their intentions may be pure, but the cards really aren't stacked in their favour.  Some folks I know have split with (AFAIK) with no infidelity involved.  They broke solemn vows to do this.  Is that evil in your opinion too - even if a little "less evil".
Billions of people commit adultery, millions will be right now. One thing that I'm absolutely certain of - not one of the people I know who got into an adulterous relationship did it with the express purpose of harming others, and especially their families.  Of course they were (or should have been) aware that such harm could happen, and that what they were doing was morally wrong.  Are they "evil" - no I don't believe so, and I don't believe that what they did was "evil".  Bloody stupid - but that's just how we are - imperfect non-robots.  Darwin made us that way.

On the other hand, what those hackers did was evil.  Not only illegal in terms of hacking, a huge breach of privacy, but conceived and carried out with the specific purpose to force the shut down a website that was perfectly legal, and to publicly shame users - and worse.   They attempted to blackmail the site owners, threatened them, and carried out the threat.  There's no moral good here at all - no "whistle-blowing" exposure of some organisation who'd been carrying out illegal activities, no "white hacker" medal - only evil.  They used force to get their way - to take it into their own hands to impose their beliefs, their values.  They belong in a prison cell.  I'll be glad when they get nailed.

Were they a fair target because they were encouraging morally unacceptable behaviour, so the end justifies the means?  No way IMO. It was cyber-terrorism targeting civilians, carried out by a pack of thugs.

If you don't like sites like AM (I surely don't) and are strongly enough motivated to do something, then lobby for a law change, set up a site warning about what they do, tell your friends, print bumper stickers, whatever.  But do not do evil - nor endorse it when it's done.

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  # 1371639 21-Aug-2015 15:03
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Have to disagree, if you were going to the point of signing up to a website specifically to find someone to cheat on your spouse with - you deserve everything you get.

This isn't having feelings for someone you meet and being conflicted and possibly acting on it (which is still wrong) - this is going out there LOOKING for someone to sleep with and cheat on your partner with.

zero sympathy - you get what you deserve.

As to the actions of the hackers - it was illegal yes and if they are caught they should be punished.

8465 posts

Uber Geek


  # 1371662 21-Aug-2015 15:23
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wasabi2k: Have to disagree, if you were going to the point of signing up to a website specifically to find someone to cheat on your spouse with - you deserve everything you get.


I'd expect that there were plenty (or probably most) who signed up with no intention of ever carrying out anything at all - but just for a little fantasy.  Too bad for them.

I'm certain that all you moral crusaders (if heterosexual, male, and with some hormones still pumping through your veins) will never voluntarily tell your partners the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth about every unverbalised or fleeting thought which goes through your head when you see an incredibly attractive woman.
If there are any heterosexual women reading this who remain too naive to believe it, ask your partner, if he denies some "impure thoughts" - you can be sure he's not being honest with you.
Tell him to go see a priest - it'll only take a few seconds in the confessional - he'll have nothing to say.
Some things are just the way they are.  You do not own your partner or each other in the way you might own a cat, nor do you own their minds or have any right or expectation to know their every thought or action.  If you think otherwise - then you're possibly setting yourself up for a very big fall.


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