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  Reply # 1874444 29-Sep-2017 03:47
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DarthKermit:

Vacuum cleaners with different diameter tubes and hoses. Can't the World Vacuum Cleaner Federation get its act together? yell



It’s VACUOUS.

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  Reply # 1874630 29-Sep-2017 11:46
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Peel Remote.

 

It came bundled with my Samsung S6.  I don't want it (I don't even know what it is, some kind of universal appliance remote thing I guess), I can't uninstall it, I can't prevent it from auto-updating and now the *&%$&^ seems to be throwing up full-screen ads.





'Listen' is an anagram of 'Silent'.


 
 
 
 


BDFL - Memuneh
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  Reply # 1874659 29-Sep-2017 12:42
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  Reply # 1874787 29-Sep-2017 14:26
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cadman:

Technical product salesmen that won't answer very specific questions posed to them by customers. I'm dealing with one f#$ktard at the moment who only answers questions that haven't actually been asked. For example if you asked him "How many items are there in a dozen?" he would reply "That may be possible."

just ask, so can you help me or not? When they still don’t answer or provide an appropriate answer ask if there’s someone else that can.

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  Reply # 1874795 29-Sep-2017 14:42
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People not answering your question:

 

 Example:

 

 Question: Would you like a cup of coffee?

 

 Answer: I am right thanks!

 

 Sorry, I did not ask how are you! Now do you want a coffee or what?

 

  

 

People starting a sentence like:

 

I "would like" to thank the ......bla bla bla.....

 

Now if you would like to thanks them,.... why not do it LOL


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  Reply # 1874953 29-Sep-2017 21:15
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Would you like a cuppa tea or coffee?

 

Me: Yes please! cool


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  Reply # 1874984 30-Sep-2017 00:11
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Goshawk:

 

 

 

People not answering your question:

 

 Example:

 

 Question: Would you like a cup of coffee?

 

 Answer: I am right thanks!

 

 Sorry, I did not ask how are you! Now do you want a coffee or what?

 

  

 

People starting a sentence like:

 

I "would like" to thank the ......bla bla bla.....

 

Now if you would like to thanks them,.... why not do it LOL

 

 

 

 

Now we will descend into a bete noir of mine....

 

 

 

I was, like, really ill.

 

So, not really ill. Just like it?

 

Sorry?

 

Why?

 

Eh? So, as I was saying, I was like really ill and, you know, Dave like didn't like that, so I like went to the beach and like had a swim, if you know what I mean.

 

Haven't a clue, dearie, now - did you want milk with your tea?






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  Reply # 1874985 30-Sep-2017 00:14
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MadEngineer:

 

Would you like a cuppa tea or coffee?

 

Me: Yes please! cool

 

 


An Americanism you hear in restaurants:

 

 

 

Waiter: What would you like to order?

 

Customer: Can I get the soup?

 

 

 

(in my head)

 

 

 

Yes, you can. Indeed, you can get anything on the menu. Now, what would you like?






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Reply # 1874986 30-Sep-2017 00:16
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MadEngineer:
cadman:

 

Technical product salesmen that won't answer very specific questions posed to them by customers. I'm dealing with one f#$ktard at the moment who only answers questions that haven't actually been asked. For example if you asked him "How many items are there in a dozen?" he would reply "That may be possible."

 

 

just ask, so can you help me or not? When they still don’t answer or provide an appropriate answer ask if there’s someone else that can.

 

Tried that. Replied asking him to answer the questions we asked. He came back with something unrelated and vague at that. There's only one other person there and he is equally useless. Under normal circumstances I would suspect this is a family business because they're usually pretty hopeless but this is the local office of a global German company.

 

Oh and the latest instalment of this particular tooth-pulling saga - the unit we're trying to find out about has a few different models. We're close to the operating limit of one model but another model's range completely overlaps both that model's range and far exceeds it. A few weeks back it was suggested that we switch to the model with the greater range because, quote "You're operating near the upper limit of the model you were specifying." But yesterday after we submitted the exact same specification stating yet again that we can't be sure of the exact figure that determines the selection at this moment, but that we need to order these as they have a 3 week lead time and he emails back asking "This is within the range of the other model. Do you want to use that instead?".





"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself."
- John Stuart Mill


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  Reply # 1874991 30-Sep-2017 00:40
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floydbloke:

Peel Remote.


It came bundled with my Samsung S6.  I don't want it (I don't even know what it is, some kind of universal appliance remote thing I guess), I can't uninstall it, I can't prevent it from auto-updating and now the *&%$&^ seems to be throwing up full-screen ads.



It will be the default app for using the IR transmitter LED. At least that app is better than the equivalent on my S4 which was called Watch On.

Agree that the bloatware is horrible. One of the best things about getting root access on the S4 was being able to delete that bloatware.





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  Reply # 1874994 30-Sep-2017 01:37
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floydbloke:

 

Peel Remote.

 

It came bundled with my Samsung S6.  I don't want it (I don't even know what it is, some kind of universal appliance remote thing I guess), I can't uninstall it, I can't prevent it from auto-updating and now the *&%$&^ seems to be throwing up full-screen ads. 

 

Geekzone: Peel Remote App Hijacks Lockscreen


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  Reply # 1875026 30-Sep-2017 10:49
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Why are drinking straws shorter than the height of a bottle?


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  Reply # 1875054 30-Sep-2017 12:30
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Why are there still cinemas participating in Vodafone's Fantastic Fridays thing that only accept paper vouchers that you have to wait to receive in the post?! It's 2017....





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  Reply # 1875098 30-Sep-2017 14:19
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When one of your favourite socks vanishes in the laundry.





'Listen' is an anagram of 'Silent'.


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  Reply # 1875117 30-Sep-2017 15:06
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floydbloke:

When one of your favourite socks vanishes in the laundry.



Somewhere in the universe there is a place with a pile containing circa 4567987374892321 odd socks





Mike
Retired IT Manager. 
The views stated in my posts are my personal views and not that of any other organisation.

 

 It's our only home, lets clean it up then...

 

Take My Advice, Pull Down Your Pants And Slide On The Ice!

 

 


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