Silly joke thread

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#2170959 31-Jan-2019 17:51

Why did the video game console cross the road?

To render the other side.

//PC Master Race

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eracode

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#2203790 23-Mar-2019 12:52

A man goes in to see a psychiatrist, raving: “Am I a wigwam or a teepee? A wigwam or a teepee? Wigwam, teepee? Wigwam or teepee?”

The shrink quickly says “Just relax - you’re two tents”.

Sometimes I just sit and think. Other times I just sit.

Rikkitic

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#2203797 23-Mar-2019 13:05

+1 for being one of the silliest jokes ever to appear here.

Plesse igmore amd axxept applogies in adbance fir anu typos

jpoc

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#2204121 24-Mar-2019 08:52

I just got a pet zebra.

I called him spot.

k1w1k1d

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#2204125 24-Mar-2019 09:23

I think this is worse.

freitasm

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#2204135 24-Mar-2019 09:56

Why haven't aliens come to the Solar system?

The reviews say it is only one star.

My technology disclosure

SaltyNZ

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#2204153 24-Mar-2019 10:46

Why did the XBox cross the road?

To render the other side.

COME AT ME CONSOLE BROS!!

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Behodar

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#2204174 24-Mar-2019 11:39

Why did SaltyNZ say the same joke twice?

He doesn't have enough RAM to remember that he already posted it.

(And that, right there, is why I don't normally make up my own jokes).

SaltyNZ

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#2204185 24-Mar-2019 12:02

Behodar: Why did SaltyNZ say the same joke twice?

He doesn't have enough RAM to remember that he already posted it.

(And that, right there, is why I don't normally make up my own jokes).

ROFL!

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nunz

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#2204206 24-Mar-2019 12:45

eracode:
frankv:

eracode:

eracode:

Wife: No

Me: It's a good name.

Wife: Babe, we're not calling the dog 'Sarah Jessica Barker' - so keep thinking.

Me: Woofie Goldberg.

Wife: Nah.

Me: Ann Huntaway.

Wife: FFS.

Me: Michael Canine.

Wife: Bingo.

B I N G O, and Bingo was his name-o.

Very good! Didn’t think of it that way when I typed it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hWcv6fGe9w

Chew Barka would’ve been the next suggestion.

We have chickens. My son named the first ones.
Artimis fowl
Cluck Norris

Later we got more and i suggested a star wars naming theme
Princess Layer
Hen Solo
Hellenium Falcon
Luke SkySquarker
Oh lay one kenobi
Senator pulletine

He rejected them for some reason.

I just got a bee hive..only another 30 000 names to go.

SaltyNZ

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#2204212 24-Mar-2019 13:03

nunz:

I just got a bee hive..only another 30 000 names to go.

Oh, you have the best puns, honey.

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These comments are my own and do not represent the opinions of 2degrees.

nunz

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#2204350 24-Mar-2019 16:53

SaltyNZ:
nunz:

I just got a bee hive..only another 30 000 names to go.

Oh, you have the best puns, honey.

Why do bees hum....

Because they cant remember the words

What goes zzub zzub zzub.?

A bee flying backwards.

Two people driving down the road when the car runs out of petrol.

The driver hops out, grabs some bees off some flowers, opens the petrol tank lid and holding the bees near the opening goes wee weee weee. Two minutes later he hops in the car, it starts and off they go.

Wow how did you do that the passenger says.
Easy replies the driver. This car runs on BP.

frankv

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#2204360 24-Mar-2019 17:51

nunz:

I just got a bee hive..only another 30 000 names to go.

O-bee-wan kenobi

Obi-wan kenobee

Whoobee Goldberg

Bee A Baracas

Bee Bee Bowness

nunz

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#2204381 24-Mar-2019 19:36

frankv:
nunz:

I just got a bee hive..only another 30 000 names to go.

O-bee-wan kenobi

Obi-wan kenobee

Whoobee Goldberg

Bee A Baracas

Bee Bee Bowness

Ive seen cee bees burning at orions gate

Oh bee haaave baby.

Jesus gave us the bee attitudes

So many literary delusions to mis quote

eracode

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#2245250 25-May-2019 11:10

Guy 1: Hmmm - some of these Italian women must be quite promiscuous.

2: Why do you say that?

1: Says here in the news that “Sarah Pippolini was laid by 100 men in three months”.

2: Nah mate - it says “Sahara pipeline laid by 100 men in three months”. Go to SpecSavers.

Sometimes I just sit and think. Other times I just sit.

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