Geekzone: technology news, blogs, forums
Guest
Welcome Guest.
You haven't logged in yet. If you don't have an account you can register now.
Filter this topic showing only the reply marked as answer View this topic in a long page with up to 500 replies per page Create new topic
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17
804 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 166


  Reply # 1694487 23-Dec-2016 23:21
Send private message quote this post

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 8 9.

804 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 166


  Reply # 1694868 25-Dec-2016 12:01
4 people support this post
Send private message quote this post

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

12026 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 3909

Trusted
Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1694875 25-Dec-2016 12:34
One person supports this post
Send private message quote this post

What do you do if you see a spaceman?

 

 

 

Park in it, man.






4480 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 2476

Trusted

  Reply # 1714176 1-Feb-2017 21:00
Send private message quote this post

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are sitting at a bar and each order a pint of beer. All three pints arrive with a fly floating in them.

 

The Englishman demands a fresh pint of beer from the bartender.

 

The Irishman shrugs and drinks it any way.

 

The Scotsman shouts "spit it back out, ya bastard!"


1130 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 254


  Reply # 1714724 2-Feb-2017 21:59
One person supports this post
Send private message quote this post

translated from Russian:

 

"While visiting daughter asked her for a newspaper. It is 21 Century, Dad - use my iPad, she said. Well, the fly did not realised what killed it ...


4480 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 2476

Trusted

  Reply # 1812825 4-Jul-2017 19:27
4 people support this post
Send private message quote this post

The wife's birthday was coming up and I asked her what she'd like. She said "something compact and shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about three seconds."

 


So I got her some bathroom scales. The doctors say that I'll probably walk again one day.


1242 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 120


  Reply # 1821893 13-Jul-2017 14:01
5 people support this post
Send private message quote this post

My colleague asked me for a joke to cheer her up yesterday, so I turned this thread (thanks!) as my brain went completely blank.  She returned the favour this morning with this:

 

"Why does the Swedish navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

 

So when they come back into port, they can Scandinavian."

 

 


12026 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 3909

Trusted
Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1821902 13-Jul-2017 14:19
Send private message quote this post

A neutron walked into a bar and ordered a beer/

 

 

 

"How much for the beer?"

 

 

 

"For you, no charge."






18504 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 5292

Trusted
Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1821903 13-Jul-2017 14:19
One person supports this post
Send private message quote this post

Lizard1977:

 

My colleague asked me for a joke to cheer her up yesterday, so I turned this thread (thanks!) as my brain went completely blank.  She returned the favour this morning with this:

 

"Why does the Swedish navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?

 

So when they come back into port, they can Scandinavian."

 

 

 

 

 

 

My wife my office had a great laugh (and groan) at this. Thanks, awesome. 

 

 


7540 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 3952


  Reply # 1821934 13-Jul-2017 14:55
One person supports this post
Send private message quote this post

 

 

 

Eye test chart for pirates


51 posts

Master Geek
+1 received by user: 19

Subscriber

  Reply # 1822726 15-Jul-2017 08:00
3 people support this post
Send private message quote this post

I tell Dad Jokes, but I have no kids.

 

I'm a faux pa.


14216 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 2572

Trusted
Subscriber

  Reply # 1829037 25-Jul-2017 12:45
2 people support this post
Send private message quote this post

I could tell you a joke about UDP, but I don't know if you'd get it.  





AWS Certified Solution Architect Professional, Sysop Administrator Associate, and Developer Associate
TOGAF certified enterprise architect
Professional photographer


18504 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 5292

Trusted
Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1829041 25-Jul-2017 12:48
Send private message quote this post

timmmay:

 

I could tell you a joke about UDP, but I don't know if you'd get it.  

 

 

Heh, that made me laugh. I know of a backup product called UDP that's a joke too.


696 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 249


  Reply # 1829126 25-Jul-2017 14:55
Send private message quote this post

timmmay:

 

I could tell you a joke about UDP, but I don't know if you'd get it.  

 

 

Now that is a geeky joke !


2523 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 970

Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1829129 25-Jul-2017 14:58
One person supports this post
Send private message quote this post

Geek starts job at McDonalds. A customer asked him for a Big Mac and he gave him a bit of paper with FF:FF:FF:FF:FF:FF written on it.

 

 


1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17
Filter this topic showing only the reply marked as answer View this topic in a long page with up to 500 replies per page Create new topic

Twitter »

Follow us to receive Twitter updates when new discussions are posted in our forums:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when news items and blogs are posted in our frontpage:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when tech item prices are listed in our price comparison site:



Geekzone Live »

Try automatic live updates from Geekzone directly in your browser, without refreshing the page, with Geekzone Live now.



Are you subscribed to our RSS feed? You can download the latest headlines and summaries from our stories directly to your computer or smartphone by using a feed reader.

Alternatively, you can receive a daily email with Geekzone updates.