Blimey, they are all coming back now.  We used to have an animal of a truck fitter called Black Jack. His standard dress was overalls with an army webbing belt round his waist.  One night shift someone sneaked up behind him, and hooked the overhead gantry to his belt, and lifted him off the floor.  Problem being they were all too scared to let him down, so he stayed there until the night shift foreman arrived.

This same Black Jack was given a job on an early Transit Van that had been hand rebuilt ready for press review. Hundreds of hours had gone into making this vehicle perfect.  They decided that as it would be tested with no weight in the back, the rear springs would be too hard, so Jack was asked to replace them.  He put the van on the ramp and lifted it up. Placed a length of 4x2 under the diff and lowered the ramp to get the rear wheels off the ground.  Then he went to get a couple of axle stands.  While he was gone, the van rolled forward on the 4x2, and came off the front of the ramp, and ended up on its roof!  When Jack got back he was rolling on the floor laughing, and got into more trouble for that, than wrecking the new van.

We eventually had a security fence around the buildings, but before that, some people used to park near the buildings to save a walk.  The main workshop got fed up with this, and had a larger than life character called Bill Bensted, in a Pantechnicon (in this case a covered car transporter) parked across the entrance.  A senior exec wanted to come in, and asked Bill to move.  After some back and forth Bill says he can't let anyone in without a pass.  Senior exec says 'My face is my pass', and Bill answers 'That's a pity mate.  I've got punch everyone's pass'.

Better get some work done :-(