Coming out on Facebook

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#371577 23-Aug-2010 15:52

And sure as heck, that annoying animal, otherwise known as your brother, will be pretty quick to suss out FB, or GZ that you've outted yourself ... you've got to tell your parents ASAP before your brother, or anyone else does. Always better to hear it first hand, no matter how hard it is. Hearing it second hand via gossip really smacks of a lack of trust with your parents. I think they wouild be more disappointed hearing it second hand, rather than from you directly.

And get to your mum before Coro St. :-) I don't think she will thank you for interrupting Coro St .... unless you have a Tivo or MySky :-/

tardtasticx

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#371579 23-Aug-2010 15:54

graemeh: Don't stress over it!! You can't change the way you feel.

When you are ready tell your parents and don't worry! They will react however they react, you can't change that either and it is nothing to be scared of (unless your dad has a mullet, spends lots of time whittling wood in his rocking chair and always has a banjo and a loaded shotgun nearby)

Funny you mention that, We went to visit his home town near Palmerston North once, and we mock him so much about him being from a hick town. haha.

And from the recent posts a lot of you say I should leave the facebook thing alone. I really understand where your coming from. But to me, it honestly feels like I'm lying to everyone. Like, at school if people see me within the 50M radius of the girl I took to the ball, they automatically say "OHH SAM SKUXXX GUY EVEN! GET IN THERE!" and dad is about the same, if I go out with mates late at night he says "Don't be bringing any ladies home Sam" and in both situations I just say "Yeh, k" and just brush it over, and everyone thinks I like that girl but I like her just as a friend. This idea just struck me actually, if I sat her down at a lunch break or something and just said to her about being gay, and girls being girls, she would tell her pack of girl friends, and one of them would tell other people who know me and it could just spread like the plague.

I spoke to my really close gay friend about how he came out, because I didn't really remember it. And he said he didn't come out, someone played a prank on him, and it turned out different to what they planned and this pack of girls outed him to the school behind his back, and everyone just knew. Everyone knows now, my straight mates give me lip about him too because we hang out a lot.

tardtasticx

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#371581 23-Aug-2010 15:55

Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

tardtasticx

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#371585 23-Aug-2010 15:56

SepticSceptic: And sure as heck, that annoying animal, otherwise known as your brother, will be pretty quick to suss out FB, or GZ that you've outted yourself ... you've got to tell your parents ASAP before your brother, or anyone else does. Always better to hear it first hand, no matter how hard it is. Hearing it second hand via gossip really smacks of a lack of trust with your parents. I think they wouild be more disappointed hearing it second hand, rather than from you directly.

And get to your mum before Coro St. :-) I don't think she will thank you for interrupting Coro St .... unless you have a Tivo or MySky :-/

My brother is like, Tech retarded. He only uses the computer for his iPod, and I don't have him on FB and he doesn't even know about geekzone. lol

tardtasticx

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#371588 23-Aug-2010 16:00

Burning beard, what are you trying to say? Both your posts are blank apart from my OP

BurningBeard

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#371589 23-Aug-2010 16:01

tardtasticx: Well I don't know if you guys know (I sure hope not anyway because you guys must be stalkers if you do xD), but I'm gay. And I told another one of my friends today (I've told 3 before him, so now 2 guys and 2 girls know) and they are my closest friends. I knew they would react great about it, which is why I told them first and I didn't want them to feel left out if they found out through someone else.

So my question is, how would you feel if you found out one of your friends was gay over Facebook?

Firstly, congratulations on "coming out". I can't imagine what it must be like but I'd guess it'd feel like a weight being lifted off your shoulders.

I'd be completely indifferent to a friend of mine "coming out" on FB since it's a non-issue to me. Two of my closest mates (who are ex flatmates too) are a gay couple and I've got other gay friends on FB too. I'd naturally expect a close friend or a best friend to tell me in person but wouldn't be the least bit offended if they outed themselves via an update - it's their choice how they make the announcement.

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#371590 23-Aug-2010 16:02

hey dude i agree with the people on here i think stay away from facebook, the day after i came out to my parents the whole town knew (small country town) and my mum thanked me for telling her before she found out from someone else. Looking back now i cant believe the courage i had to come out them. good on you. i hardly post on here but with something so close to my own experience had to give you some kudos! i came out to them when i was 18 and they took it just OK at the start but now are completly fine (5 years on you would hope so too a! i think was due to being such a small town i lived in)

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#371591 23-Aug-2010 16:02

tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

Have you looked at your own profile?

Linuxluver

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#371596 23-Aug-2010 16:05

tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

It's in your Geekzone profile. I just clicked on TardtasticX.

I thought you knew.... ??

(You could have said: "NO...That's a bogus name"...)

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#371597 23-Aug-2010 16:05

tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

my guess, he clicked on your name link, that goes to your profile page. On that page, just next to the caption "Full name:"...

<edit - snap>

tardtasticx

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#371598 23-Aug-2010 16:06

Linuxluver:
tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

It's in your Geekzone profile. I just clicked on TardtasicX.

I thought you knew.... ??

OMG LOL No I didn't know. I've never looked at my public profile. I changed it now but I think I put that there because I thought it was part of registration or something. My bad guys. sorry

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#371602 23-Aug-2010 16:10

tardtasticx:
Linuxluver:
tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

It's in your Geekzone profile. I just clicked on TardtasicX.

I thought you knew.... ??

OMG LOL No I didn't know. I've never looked at my public profile. I changed it now but I think I put that there because I thought it was part of registration or something. My bad guys. sorry

Perhaps you could get a mod to edit out your full name on the other post?

Linuxluver

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#371604 23-Aug-2010 16:10

tardtasticx:
Linuxluver:
tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

It's in your Geekzone profile. I just clicked on TardtasicX.

I thought you knew.... ??

OMG LOL No I didn't know. I've never looked at my public profile. I changed it now but I think I put that there because I thought it was part of registration or something. My bad guys. sorry

I'd remove your name from my post, but MF has thing about people correcting themselves after they say the wrong thing. ;-)

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#371611 23-Aug-2010 16:14

Linuxluver:
tardtasticx:
Linuxluver:
tardtasticx: Thanks LinuxLuver for putting my whole name out there. How did you find my last name by the way

It's in your Geekzone profile. I just clicked on TardtasicX.

I thought you knew.... ??

OMG LOL No I didn't know. I've never looked at my public profile. I changed it now but I think I put that there because I thought it was part of registration or something. My bad guys. sorry

I'd remove your name from my post, but MF has thing about people correcting themselves after they say the wrong thing. ;-)

Very different things... One thing is you spilling out beans by mistake, the other is posting an opinion, inflaming a debate then later on changing it to something completely different.

I will change the post to remove the full name.

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#371647 23-Aug-2010 16:48

On the plus side, tardtasticx now knows his adrenalin glands work after that little hiccup involving his name :-P

I know a father & son that were having communication issues recently & were seeing a councillor/psychologist/what ever they are called these days. The councillor suggested writing letters and putting them in the post instead of talking, as they found it so hard to do so. His reasoning was that that way you can get your wording right, and explain to them without them being able to interrupt and if needed, be out of the house when it arrives in the post. The son who I am friends with says it works really well. Just an idea.

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