Who would you blame in this situation? Poll

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MatthewD

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#323953 7-Feb-2026 18:10

The situation...

Manager X and Person A work for company no. 1

Person B and Leader Y work for company no. 2

Person A and Person B are long time friends, but the friendship has cooled in recent years slightly

Person A tells friend Person B that their team have been having serious trouble with Manager X, Person A tells person B that a meeting was held involving the staff (manager X wasn't invited), the staff discuss the situation and decide that the best course of action is to do nothing... they will make do as best they can.

Person B heard this story and at a later date decided to tell his mentor Leader Y.

Mentor Y tells Manager X the story and Person A and EVERYONE ELSE at company 1 gets in trouble as a result. Big trouble.

Background information...
Person A didn't tell person B that it was a secret (but it should have been obvious because it was a secret meeting), person A was just "giving the news" when the story was told.
Person B is well meaning but was already known by person A to be bad with secrets
Leader Y told the story out of malice, Leader Y wanted to destroy the friendship between A and B, Leader Y didn't even know Manager X

So the poll question is... who is mostly to blame...

all 3 people people above

all of the people in the meeting

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#3459513 7-Feb-2026 18:11

IMO the people at the meeting choosing to do nothing.

Richard rich.ms

farcus

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#3459515 7-Feb-2026 18:16

when a team is having trouble with a manager it is inevitable that it will get back to the manager eventually.
In the meeting they sholdn't have decided to do nothing.

Out of interest . . . what kind of trouble can people get into?
Nobody has really done anything worthy of discipline.

MatthewD

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#3459517 7-Feb-2026 18:26

Great question... the people who work at company 1 are working at a special Company where loyalty and camaraderie are taken very seriously and punishment is possible.

richms

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#3459519 7-Feb-2026 18:53

Sounds like any "punishment" would be something that might fall foul of labour laws in that case.

Company 1 sounds like one of those toxic places that is a small business where they regard "everyone as family" and expect people on near minimum to give a crap like they own the place and act all shocked when people don't.

Richard rich.ms

gzt

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#3459520 7-Feb-2026 18:57

special Company where loyalty and camaraderie are taken very seriously and punishment is possible.

That sounds a lot like Dad's Army for some reason.

What kind of 'punishment' is possible?

The best thing to do is resolve the situation, now it's come to light. That was always going to happen given the number of people in the meeting.

Qazzy03

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#3459521 7-Feb-2026 18:57

So the poll question is... who is mostly to blame...

Um I think you are missing one option.... 'X'.

I blame 'X', Y is toxic and A & B friendship will probably not last as this could be seen as a breach of trust.
TBH A & B have unsafe workspaces and both should find new employers, jobs, companies etc.

But overall 'X' is the one to where I would say is the root cause.

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Bung

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#3459571 7-Feb-2026 19:30

gzt:
special Company where loyalty and camaraderie are taken very seriously and punishment is possible.

That sounds a lot like Dad's Army for some reason.

Sounds like a well known burger empire.

gzt

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#3459584 7-Feb-2026 21:23

Bung:
special Company where loyalty and camaraderie are taken very seriously and punishment is possible.

Sounds like a well known burger empire.

I've just clicked the guy who was giving me a stare at the gym recently was the order assembler when I visited mcd recently. Anyway, my order was slightly wrong, it happens no big deal I took it back to the counter and some supervisor walked off with it and talked to several people. I didn't pay much attention. What exactly do they do to people there?

Lias

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#3459830 9-Feb-2026 09:01

X and Y, because both are clearly toxic leaders.

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wellygary

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#3459833 9-Feb-2026 09:29

"Person A and EVERYONE ELSE at company 1 gets in trouble as a result. Big trouble."

What for????...

A bunch of people got together and had a moan about a Manager.(and decided to do nothing) .. big deal , it will be happening every day...

What is "big trouble".???..
If its any sort of Formal process, then its certainly in violation of NZ employment law...

The only person who should be blamed is the person at company 1 who "punished" this lot, and has likely opened the company up to action at the Employment Relations Tribunal..

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#3459861 9-Feb-2026 10:40

Person A should've kept their fat mouth shut.

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Tinkerisk

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#3459873 9-Feb-2026 11:07

A secret is no secret outside of the tube. 😁 For me: A is the root cause, because A is crossing the company boundary. B is next.

A classic, self-inflicted problem created by gossipmongers, which doesn't mean that Manager X isn‘t unsuitable for his job.

Qui nihil scit, omnia credere debet.
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In effect we have everything to hide from someone, and no idea who someone is.

gzt

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#3459875 9-Feb-2026 11:12

Mentor Y tells Manager X the story and Person A and EVERYONE ELSE at company 1 gets in trouble as a result. Big trouble.

Has everyone at "company 1" heard IKEA NZ is hiring at a starting rate of $29 per hour? ; ). Maybe they need to know.

richms

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#3460036 9-Feb-2026 19:30

As nice as that sounds. It's minimum in AUD converted over so it's still inexplicable why people want to leave NZ when the 60k that some people think is a good wage is equal to min wage in Aussie.

Richard rich.ms

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#3460092 9-Feb-2026 21:30

I blame Professor Plum who was clearly in the library with the candlestick.

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