Being labelled a child beater is hard to deal with?

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Byrned

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#58971 24-Mar-2010 08:42

So I saw this article in the Herald this morning and I had to laugh at the guy

Whether you think he punched or flicked his son, when it is said "...being labelled a child beater is hard to deal with and has at least once led to him punching someone who provoked him", I would have to think "Anger management problems." People have provoked me numerous times... I walk away!

And saying that the parenting courses are a waste of time because they catered to a Utopian world of parenting rather than a world where "I woke up on a bender because I got pissed the night before and my kids are screaming" - is he on drugs? Well, maybe yes. Who knows!

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10633872

kingjj

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#310575 24-Mar-2010 09:18

Isn't it great how reporters can pick and choose what to quote and the context of said quote. From all accounts this guy is a nice guy. He can often be seen shopping with his kids in town and has always seemed like a normal parent, sometimes with screaming children in toe. I spoke with a few of his associates after the charge was first placed and it devastated this gent, and I can understand why. Christchurch is not a very big city at the end of the day and Chinese Whispers can spread nice and quickly throughout the community, for a guy like this who was reasonably well known in certain parts of the city already (and not for negative reasons) it would be difficult to deal with. I hope he does successfully challenge the conviction, unfortunately if he does it still won't remove the stigma all this press coverage has created around him.

NonprayingMantis

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#310631 24-Mar-2010 10:44

so the guy demonstrates how he can control his temper by lashing out at strangers?

I'm sure they were totally convinced of his innocence after that.

vinnieg

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#310638 24-Mar-2010 10:55

Sideshow bob!!!

Yeah definitely think he burned himself using that phrase to show them the guy a difference between a pinch and a punch, he should've probably kept quiet about that

I have moved across the ditch. Now residing in Melbourne as a VOIP/Video Technical Trainer/Engineer.

MikeyPI

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#310640 24-Mar-2010 11:01

kingjj: Isn't it great how reporters can pick and choose what to quote and the context of said quote. From all accounts this guy is a nice guy. He can often be seen shopping with his kids in town and has always seemed like a normal parent, sometimes with screaming children in toe. I spoke with a few of his associates after the charge was first placed and it devastated this gent, and I can understand why. Christchurch is not a very big city at the end of the day and Chinese Whispers can spread nice and quickly throughout the community, for a guy like this who was reasonably well known in certain parts of the city already (and not for negative reasons) it would be difficult to deal with. I hope he does successfully challenge the conviction, unfortunately if he does it still won't remove the stigma all this press coverage has created around him.

The stigma? Of what? Being charged, tried, and convicted? Thats the law buddy.. The question you have to ask is why would all these people lie/conspire to do this (according to you) nice guy in?
Witnesses/ police / judicial system / where all in on it huh? The dudes violent, he admitted it, now he admits to lashing out at strangers, my heart bleeds. As for your Chinese whispers, this was widely publicised, as both he and the pro-smackers thought that he would be the shining example of the problems with the anti-smacking bill, but it turns out hes just another parent who cant control their emotions.

I love how he was the poster boy for the pro-smacking lobby until the facts come to light, he gets convicted, then oh ohh, better sweep that one under the carpet, but thats the problem when you platform is based on hitting your kids.

Dont we tell our kids not to bully, and violence never solves anything?

kingjj

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#310899 24-Mar-2010 18:06

Every person has the right to appeal a conviction, in this case there are strong grounds to doubt that he was guilty beyond a shadow of a doubt. We'll let the Court of Appeals decide that, until then I am withholding judgement. As for the article, my point still stands, journalists (of which I know a thing or two about) are extremely good at morphing comments to support which ever angle the article is portraying. For rags such as the NZ Herald the editorial standards are often lacking so I wouldn't take what they report too seriously. This man was made a scapegoat for the system (some peoples opinion), other similar cases have resulted in warnings; why not his? Setting aside the "hes violent" opinion that seems to have been formed based on one quote of dubious integrity, he's a normal father who was trying to control an unruly child (who did not receive any injuries). Your welcome to your opinion MikeyPI, I stand by mine though.

Byrned

455 posts

Ultimate Geek

#311147 25-Mar-2010 09:35

I'm not denying that journalism as a whole seems to be quite poor and I don't know this guy from bar of soap, nor would I be willing to say "he's a stand up guy" based on a couple of conversations I've had with pals of his. As an extreme example I'm sure I could've found some of William Bell's friends who thought he was a stand up guy as well.

But if someone has punched someone because they provoked him, he has anger management problems.

Unfortunately one of the sad facts around child abuse is in a lot of cases the 'abuse' is being done by parents who really do care for their children and think they are doing right by them.

Lets just say that, using his example of screaming kids when he wakes up after being on a bender, that they are screaming because they're hungry and it's coming up on midday. Not totally unreasonable to assume. When I've been out the night before and had a few drinks I can easily sleep to midday. Now lest assume also that this parent (and I'm not saying it was Mason, I'm trying to put this in a hypothetical way to make a point) yells at his kids to keep quiet. Or even gives them a gentle smack. I would imagine that this scenario could be quite likely across New Zealand. But is it the child's fault that the parent went out on a bender the night before, and now has a hangover, has slept in, and not fed them? In my opinion this falls under mental abuse. A very mild form, but abuse nonetheless and unchecked over a number of years, can (not usually) lead to serious issues. This is the type of behavior that as a society we need to say is not acceptable.

Now at no point do I say he is or isn't guilty of what happened. I wasn't there. I don't know. And I do believe, at times, a smack may be warranted. But it does seem, based on some random comments that his attitude is symptomatic of the parenting problems in New Zealand. Obviously some of these problems are more serious than others...