The dumbest Stuff or Herald headlines (& other news media)

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#2390783 13-Jan-2020 08:29

Geektastic:

DarthKermit:

latest news headlines
9:04 PM
Can the monarchy's 'magic' last? video
9:03 PM
Kelly Ripa's clap back to fashion critic is our favorite holiday surprise
9:01 PM
Kate Middleton met babies and midwives while volunteering in hospital maternity ward
8:30 PM
The next step for VAR
8:22 PM
Sara Gilbert separates from wife Linda Perry after 5 years of marriage
8:17 PM
Look back at Kourtney Kardashian's most memorable moments of the past decade
8:14 PM
Inside Chrissy Teigen and John Legend's love story: In-N-Out Burgers and 'super sexy photos'
8:10 PM
Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave is asking for help choosing between these four baby names

A snapshot from Stuff. They call this news???

Was it 'Breaking News' though?

The news has been broken for quite some time now, as this thread shows.

MotorDrive Rallying

sittingduckz

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#2390799 13-Jan-2020 09:35

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=12299751

'We are not alone': Confirmation of alien life 'imminent and inevitable'

At least land the probes first! I saw this and thought maybe there was soon to be a news conference telling us about a microbe that was discovered.

imminent

adjective

1. 1. about to happen. "they were in imminent danger of being swept away"

1. 2. Does not mean in a few years time

Disclaimer: I added 1.2 myself

Edit: Formatting

I'm not a complete idiot, I still have some parts missing.

floydbloke

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#2390822 13-Jan-2020 10:13

sittingduckz:

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=12299751

'We are not alone': Confirmation of alien life 'imminent and inevitable'

At least land the probes first! I saw this and thought maybe there was soon to be a news conference telling us about a microbe that was discovered.

imminent

adjective

1. 1. about to happen. "they were in imminent danger of being swept away"

1. 2. Does not mean in a few years time

Disclaimer: I added 1.2 myself

Edit: Formatting

If there was no such thing as ambiguity there'd be lots of sales people, marketing people and politicians (and journalists as well I guess) out of a job.

Sometimes I use big words I don't always fully understand in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

tdgeek

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#2390826 13-Jan-2020 10:21

I see no issue with that article, there are a lot of reasons why they are positive. Its not magic its chemistry, and the chemical requirements for life are abundant in this solar system and everywhere else. The only barrier is you cant hire a digger and take a sample that easily on these moons

Batman

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#2390853 13-Jan-2020 10:38

sittingduckz:

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=12299751

'We are not alone': Confirmation of alien life 'imminent and inevitable'

At least land the probes first! I saw this and thought maybe there was soon to be a news conference telling us about a microbe that was discovered.

imminent

adjective

1. 1. about to happen. "they were in imminent danger of being swept away"

1. 2. Does not mean in a few years time

Disclaimer: I added 1.2 myself

Edit: Formatting

It's been imminent since the probe was launched. They expect to find what they expect to find. Reminds me of the picture of the black hole. So they finally rendered a photo of a particular black hole after 2 years of taking digital data of the black hole. Trouble is, the final render was exactly the same as the image they rendered before the 2 years of gathering the data. I laughed so hard while the whole world was mesmerized.

Jogre

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#2391017 13-Jan-2020 14:17

Not really a dumb headline, but having two kids pretending to help a dead whale as your headline image pissed me off a bit.

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=12297998

(Disclaimer: I was helping, only 200 of the people were helping if I was being generous while the rest took Instagram selfies etc or pushed helpers out of the way to take pictures, people were hovering drones overhead which DoC staff should have said something about)

Jono Green

Microsoft New Zealand

Journeyman

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#2391105 13-Jan-2020 15:52

I've decided to have fun and come up with my own sensationalist headline for an article:

100-year-old freed from captivity as sex slave

frankv

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#2391117 13-Jan-2020 16:29

Journeyman:

100-year-old freed from captivity as sex slave

I'm shocked that this hasn't broken the Internet.

SheriffNZ

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#2398976 16-Jan-2020 13:19

Student Loan debt arrest - Headline - first one ever!

Further down the article - just the first in 2020.

Later on, there's been a bunch, and actually here's an article we wrote about it a few years ago too.

SheriffNZ

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#2398990 16-Jan-2020 13:21

SheriffNZ:

Student Loan debt arrest - Headline - first one ever!

Further down the article - just the first in 2020.

Later on, there's been a bunch, and actually here's an article we wrote about it a few years ago too.

Woah - sorry about the big pictures!

wellygary

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#2399011 16-Jan-2020 13:36

Well Stuff have even given up pretending that they actually do any journalism now... this story actually made it into the print edition on the Dom Post on Thursday .... in the business section

"Wellington woman Emma Ward said on Twitter on Sunday: "I am at a cafe in Auckland and the GF bread is $4 extra. $4! I understand it's an extra cost but it is also super ableist."

The 27-year-old said gluten free bread was quite pricey, but the surcharge was usually $2."

https://www.stuff.co.nz/business/118773354/coeliac-sufferer-says-cafe-4-gluten-free-surcharge-is-profiteering