Geekzone: technology news, blogs, forums
Guest
Welcome Guest.
You haven't logged in yet. If you don't have an account you can register now.




70 posts

Master Geek
+1 received by user: 38


Topic # 191216 27-Jan-2016 20:56
One person supports this post
Send private message

I've just had a great phone call from someone from "Microsoft 10 Windows Technical Support Help Desk" using the NZ number 06 864 3267 (I love caller ID).

 

Of course knowing fully well that the Microsoft 10 Windows Technical Support Help Desk wouldn't be ringing me because 1. They wouldn't know me from a bar of soap, and 2. All our computers at home run Mac OS and 3. Why would Microsoft be ringing me at home anyway? I decided to have as much fun as I could.

 

After being told that I have ..picked up a "virus software program" from visiting Facebook and Twitter, I knew where we were about to head. The conversation went along the lines of:

 

Caller: "What do you see on the screen?"

 

Me: "Its black."

 

Caller: "You mean its turned off"

 

Me: "I don't know, how do I know its turned off?"

 

Caller: "Can you turn it on for me please?"

 

Me: "How do I do that?"

 

Caller: "You push the on button."

 

Me: "What on button?"

 

Caller (getting a bit upset): "The button to turn it on."

 

Me: "Oh, you mean the hammer beside me?"

 

Caller (Now very upset as this isn't going to plan): "Use the f****** hammer to hit yourself in the head" (I didn't think Technical Support Help Desks were so rude tongue-out).

 

Me: "Good bye" and hung up.

 

Anyone else find doing this sort of thing fun?


Create new topic
BDFL - Memuneh
59999 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 11098

Administrator
Trusted
Geekzone
Lifetime subscriber

  Reply # 1480254 27-Jan-2016 21:10
5 people support this post
Send private message

I mentioned before... A woman called me, my laptop was on but I still asked her to give me time to "turn it on"... After making her wait a few minutes I loaded had a pr0n video site, turned speakers at max volume and started playing one of the movies.

 

She was the one who hang up.





2718 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 417


Reply # 1480257 27-Jan-2016 21:21
Send private message

Awww shucks you guys are being mean. cool





Sony Xperia X running Sailfish
Jolla C
Nokia N1
Dell Inspiron 14z i5


 
 
 
 


Try Wrike: fast, easy, and efficient project collaboration software
281 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 18


  Reply # 1480261 27-Jan-2016 21:42
Send private message

freitasm:

 

I mentioned before... A woman called me, my laptop was on but I still asked her to give me time to "turn it on"... After making her wait a few minutes I loaded had a pr0n video site, turned speakers at max volume and started playing one of the movies.

 

She was the one who hang up.

 

 

Great tactic, i've got to try this next time i get a call like this!


2247 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 1070


  Reply # 1480274 27-Jan-2016 22:11
Send private message

Scoring of scam baits:

 

1 point for each minute you keep them on the line

 

2 points for each time they call you back

 

5 points for each time they swear at you

 

10 points for each extra person (supervisor, 2nd-level tech) you get to talk to

 

bonus points for funny accents, speech impediments, thinking up a storyline for your improv session

 

I usually start out with "Hang on, there's someone at the door" (I wonder if I could get away with "Hang on, there's someone on the phone"?)

 

Then it always takes me a long time to turn the computer on (read out as much as I can remember of an entire BSOD), and maybe the power goes off, and I accidentally hang up (an easy 2 points!). During this time, you can think up your improv scenario. My best effort involved the person coming back to the door, his dog attacking me (rarked up my own dog for sound effects), but I shot it (handclaps), and the visitor for good measure. Then I bled to death.

 

@freitasm: Where do you go to get those videos? innocent

 

 

 

 


1025 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 95

Trusted

  Reply # 1481242 29-Jan-2016 14:21
One person supports this post
Send private message

frankv:5 points for each time they swear at you 

 

 

 

Hee hee...

 

"F___ you buddy" was the last thing the guy said before he hung up on me last time I had one.

 

 

 

I told him I ordered my Lamb Korma and Garlic Naan three hours ago and he was taking too long.

 

I know that might look/sound racist but when you try to rip me off, all courtesies and pleasantries go out the window.





My very metal Doctor Who theme

1234 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 522


  Reply # 1481291 29-Jan-2016 15:41
One person supports this post
Send private message

freitasm: After making her wait a few minutes I loaded had a pr0n video site, turned speakers at max volume and started playing one of the movies.

 

Is that what they call "promiscuous mode"?  I hope there were no children nearby!

 

I usually just make up some gobbledegook by combining random technical terms into nonsensical sentences, e.g.: "I'm just waiting for the modem to finish load balancing so I can synchronise my network and telnet into the VPN" and "Do I need to uplink the reverse DNS lookup results to the static IP table or can I just re-route the subnet through the short haul gateway?" They usually swear and hang up in about two minutes.


643 posts

Ultimate Geek
+1 received by user: 179


  Reply # 1481321 29-Jan-2016 16:00
Send private message

Some I know kept them on the line for three hours, I get sick of it after 3 minutes and hang up.

 

I do like the scoring system and will try harder.

 

I might also have another router to isolate traffic off my network ( mine can not do VLAN ) and pull out my old junker when they call.





I know enough to be dangerous


2029 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 345

Trusted
Subscriber

  Reply # 1481324 29-Jan-2016 16:04
Send private message

Another reason I love not having a landline :-)





When you live your life on Twitter and Facebook, and are only friends with like minded people on Twitter and Facebook, you are not living in the real world. You are living in a narcissistic echo chamber.

 


My thoughts are my own and are in no way representative of my employer.


1431 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 726


  Reply # 1481329 29-Jan-2016 16:12
Send private message

BurningBeard:

 

frankv:5 points for each time they swear at you 

 

 

 

Hee hee...

 

"F___ you buddy" was the last thing the guy said before he hung up on me last time I had one.

 

 

 

I told him I ordered my Lamb Korma and Garlic Naan three hours ago and he was taking too long.

 

I know that might look/sound racist but when you try to rip me off, all courtesies and pleasantries go out the window.

 

 

Yep, these lowlifes ripped off an elderly relative of mine to the tune of $200 so they deserve as much abuse as they get

 

Unfortunately they never seem to ring me, it would be good sport to string them along for as long as possible


1161 posts

Uber Geek
+1 received by user: 112


  Reply # 1481335 29-Jan-2016 16:24
Send private message

I got a call from these guys about a week ago to tell me I had viruses on my Windows.

 

I told them to wait while I got the spray 'n' wipe and a cloth to clean the viruses off my windows.  They hung up immediately.

 

Some people have no sense of humour... ;)


Create new topic



Twitter »

Follow us to receive Twitter updates when new discussions are posted in our forums:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when news items and blogs are posted in our frontpage:



Follow us to receive Twitter updates when tech item prices are listed in our price comparison site:





News »

Amazon launches the International Shopping Experience in the Amazon Shopping App
Posted 19-Apr-2018 08:38


Spark New Zealand and TVNZ to bring coverage of Rugby World Cup 2019
Posted 16-Apr-2018 06:55


How Google can seize Microsoft Office crown
Posted 14-Apr-2018 11:08


How back office transformation drives IRD efficiency
Posted 12-Apr-2018 21:15


iPod laws in a smartphone world: will we ever get copyright right?
Posted 12-Apr-2018 21:13


Lightbox service using big data and analytics to learn more about customers
Posted 9-Apr-2018 12:11


111 mobile caller location extended to iOS
Posted 6-Apr-2018 13:50


Huawei announces the HUAWEI P20 series
Posted 29-Mar-2018 11:41


Symantec Internet Security Threat Report shows increased endpoint technology risks
Posted 26-Mar-2018 18:29


Spark switches on long-range IoT network across New Zealand
Posted 26-Mar-2018 18:22


Stuff Pix enters streaming video market
Posted 21-Mar-2018 09:18


Windows no longer Microsoft’s main focus
Posted 13-Mar-2018 07:47


Why phone makers are obsessed with cameras
Posted 11-Mar-2018 12:25


New Zealand Adopts International Open Data Charter
Posted 3-Mar-2018 12:48


Shipments tumble as NZ phone upgrades slow
Posted 2-Mar-2018 11:48



Geekzone Live »

Try automatic live updates from Geekzone directly in your browser, without refreshing the page, with Geekzone Live now.



Are you subscribed to our RSS feed? You can download the latest headlines and summaries from our stories directly to your computer or smartphone by using a feed reader.

Alternatively, you can receive a daily email with Geekzone updates.