The ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER (what really happened)

According to a revisionist version of this classic tale, the ant was a noble, hard-working creature who thought ahead and planned for his own future, while the lazy no-good grasshopper lived off the sweat of others. In fact, things were a little different:

The ant and the grasshopper grew up in the same neighbourhood. They lived in modest circumstances but were able to get by. Public housing was adequate and everyone had a fair share of the pie. The grasshopper was content with his lot and spent his free time helping out his neighbours with small chores and errands. The neighbourhood was a happy place and everyone got along. There was no crime or violence. The strong social cohesion ensured that young grasshoppers in danger of going off the rails were shown the error of their ways and redirected into productive activities. Life was good.

Unfortunately, the ant was not happy with this. He wanted more. Especially, he wanted more than the grasshopper had. Instead of devoting his energy to helping others, he decided to follow the money and made a career in banking. Soon he became a currency speculator and grew rich by exploiting a system built by others like him.

Because he was rich, the ant was able to buy a much bigger house than the grasshopper had and he filled it with expensive foods. But this was not enough for him. He wanted more. So he went into politics.

Soon the ant was running the neighbourhood. He told other ants that they did not have to share with grasshoppers or help out others. They were better off keeping what they had for themselves. Let the grasshoppers solve their own problems.

The ants collected more and more food. Soon there was not enough to go around and the grasshoppers began to go hungry. They pleaded for help but the ants were too busy eating to listen. The more they had, the more they wanted, and they began changing the rules to ensure that less and less went to the grasshoppers. They bought up all the houses in the neighbourhood and sold them back to the highest bidders. The grasshoppers could no longer afford them. They taxed any income the grasshoppers earned, but not the profits they themselves made from the houses or other investments. As more and more of the pie went to them, there was less and less for the grasshoppers.

As the grasshoppers became impoverished and ill and homeless, their social cohesion disintegrated and they became victims of crime and violence. Their young turned to drugs and joined gangs in order to survive. Suicide rates shot up. The happy and carefree world they once knew was gone.

The grasshoppers pleaded for social justice, but the ants said their plight was their own fault. They had no-one to blame for being poor but themselves. They should get a job. They should drink less alcohol and smoke less tobacco and take fewer holidays.

But for grasshoppers there were not so many jobs, and the ones that did exist were mainly serving hamburgers to the ants, or working in their supermarkets. The pay was not enough to live on. Sometimes they had second jobs, and even third ones, but the pay was still not enough to live on. They could not afford a proper home. They could not afford to see the doctor. This was the world the ants had made.

When the next neighbourhood election was due, the ants were filled with confidence. Although their first leader had moved on to enjoy his plunder, they had a new one who was a safe pair of antennae. The grasshopper opposition was in disarray, hopelessly out of touch with the electorate. But then something happened. Out of the ashes of their destroyed world rose a new, charismatic leader, a beacon of hope, a Jacinda of Ardernia. Under her visionary and inspirational leadership the selfish and greedy ants were routed and justice returned to the neighbourhood. There was much that had to be repaired and rebuilt to heal the damage that had been done, but the neighbours united with a new sense of purpose and they knew things could only get better.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2017