This is a true story, I swear it, I was present. 

So we go to a restaurant on the way home from holiday this evening. We are waiting in line for a table, waitress reaches the people in front of me, a mother, her infant, and what I presume was her mother. The mother holding the baby says "Can we please have a table for two, and a high chair"... 

I am not kidding... The waitress says .. "for the baby?".

I could NOT help myself. I say to the waitress.. "Actually, no, she just bought a brand new car and thought it would be safer inside than in the carpark".

Not 3 minutes later as we are seated, a couple come in, ask for a table for two, she says, sure, goes away to get two menus, comes back and says "just the two of you then"? I wanted to say "no, actually they changed their mind, in the last 15 seconds, and have arranged for 10 friends to join them.

Good Grief!