Snip.co.nz vasectomy options

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Networkn
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#2909174 2-May-2022 09:24

blackjack17:

I was never asked what my wife thinks.

Neither.

What did happen however, is that immediately after my second was born, I wanted to make sure we didn't have a third, I was mid thirties and the doctor I saw initially, refused and said I was too young and without a medical reason he strongly discouraged it. He gave a couple of reasons which seemed reasonable, but I was still a bit surprised.

In the end I waited a while.

MikeAqua

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#2909219 2-May-2022 10:40

networkn:

blackjack17:

I was never asked what my wife thinks.

Neither.

What did happen however, is that immediately after my second was born, I wanted to make sure we didn't have a third, I was mid thirties and the doctor I saw initially, refused and said I was too young and without a medical reason he strongly discouraged it. He gave a couple of reasons which seemed reasonable, but I was still a bit surprised.

In the end I waited a while.

Interesting. I was also about mid thirties and in the situation where my wife wanted more kids and I didn't because we had two under five and I wasn't sure about the future of the relationship. I was honest about that. I changed doctors, went direct to the surgeon, tried again as a single person - still no dice. I gave up trying when I met my current partner, as there was no longer a significant risk of pregnancy.

15 years later, my ex never did find anyone to have those additional kids with. Still no more kids for me and still no desire to have them. Having educated myself more on the subject, and having seen it go seriously wrong for a friend, I'm glad I didn't risk a vasectomy.

That said, I think any adult male should be able to get the snip regardless of life circumstances, should they want to. The success rate of reversals is 95% within ten years.

Mike

elpenguino

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#2909233 2-May-2022 11:10

MikeAqua:

That said, I think any adult male should be able to get the snip regardless of life circumstances, should they want to. The success rate of reversals is 95% within ten years.

If we flip the situation around, we(*) think a female should be able to get any contraception or abortion she wants - her body, her decision etc etc.

Should have been the same for you. Actually, it's outrageous it wasn't.

* - YMMV

Most of the posters in this thread are just like chimpanzees on MDMA, full of feelings of bonhomie, joy, and optimism. Fred99 8/4/21

MikeAqua

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#2909263 2-May-2022 12:56

elpenguino:

If we flip the situation around, we(*) think a female should be able to get any contraception or abortion she wants - her body, her decision etc etc.

Should have been the same for you. Actually, it's outrageous it wasn't.

* - YMMV

Back then a vasectomy was (legally) more accessible than a termination. So, the barriers should have been lower.

Mike

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#2909325 2-May-2022 14:09

MikeAqua:

edit: In the case of my mate; he had kick-in-the-stones-level pain most of the time for about 3 years, before the Doctors would take him seriously, and then had to 100% privately fund corrective surgery to address. He's OK now, bit it was a bit of horror show for him. At one stage he was advised to get a unilateral orchidectomy.

I missed this. I didn't have it as severe but I was very uncomfortable for quite a few days and to be honest the doctor was entirely disinterested. I thought it was 10 days I was off from activity, but I recall it was actually a lot longer according to my wife. 3 weeks before I was entirely pain free and I still get the occasional weird twinge etc. As I said though, my situation was fairly atypical, I know many many who have had pain free and trouble-free experiences.

One thing is, if you feel you aren't right, and you'll know, don't be a big tough kiwi bloke and ignore it, go and get it checked out ASAP it can save a lot of misery later.

MikeAqua

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#2909610 3-May-2022 11:50

networkn:

I missed this. I didn't have it as severe but I was very uncomfortable for quite a few days and to be honest the doctor was entirely disinterested. I thought it was 10 days I was off from activity, but I recall it was actually a lot longer according to my wife. 3 weeks before I was entirely pain free and I still get the occasional weird twinge etc. As I said though, my situation was fairly atypical, I know many many who have had pain free and trouble-free experiences.

One thing is, if you feel you aren't right, and you'll know, don't be a big tough kiwi bloke and ignore it, go and get it checked out ASAP it can save a lot of misery later.

With my mate he has a history of kidney stones. No relevance to his snip except he said he pain resulting from the complications of the surgery was worse than kidney stones. I've never had kidney stones, but I'm told they are very painful.

He also had difficulty getting anyone to take him seriously. Eventually he had surgery (100% privately funded) to get the lower remnant of the vas reopened, effectively making it an open vasectomy, and have some tissue removed as well. GA for the surgery and tramadol for a couple of weeks after. He is all good now and still shooting blanks, but he had a couple of years of hell from his low risk surgery. Divorced from the women he had the vasectomy for and remarried.

Mike

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afe66

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#2909649 3-May-2022 13:50

elpenguino:
MikeAqua:

That said, I think any adult male should be able to get the snip regardless of life circumstances, should they want to. The success rate of reversals is 95% within ten years.

If we flip the situation around, we(*) think a female should be able to get any contraception or abortion she wants - her body, her decision etc etc.

Should have been the same for you. Actually, it's outrageous it wasn't.

* - YMMV

Not quite comparable with regular female contraception as the snip is a relatively permenent procedure. You will find a similar reluctance to do tubal
ligation in young women.

With women.
On one hand as you say it's my body my choice vrs the extreme drama of someone later regretting their choice or sufferer a complication and its month to year complaint letters dhc replies etc. To say we discuss they and they agreed they wanted surgery won't be enough.. "I didn't understand when I consented"

(this is definitely not the same as asking husbands if the agree to wife sterilisation with is medival)

alasta

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#2909683 3-May-2022 15:27

It seems to me that medical practitioners are having to make judgments about the personal impact of not being able to have a child versus having an unwanted child. It's a bit of an ethical minefield.

MikeAqua

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#2909961 4-May-2022 08:49

alasta:

It seems to me that medical practitioners are having to make judgments about the personal impact of not being able to have a child versus having an unwanted child. It's a bit of an ethical minefield.

It's actually really simple. Let adults make their own informed decisions, sign a consent form and live with the adverse consequences if any. It would be a relatively simple process to explain those potential consequences and ensure the patient understood them.

Mike

networkn

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#2910027 4-May-2022 11:51

MikeAqua:

It's actually really simple. Let adults make their own informed decisions, sign a consent form and live with the adverse consequences if any. It would be a relatively simple process to explain those potential consequences and ensure the patient understood them.

Simple, until someone disputes the form was signed in good health and with full understanding, or someone a couple of years down the track disputes they were made aware enough, or claims they didn't understand.

The problem is, the Doctor is the one who carries the can.

Personally, I'd like to see a mandatory 1-hour counselling session and a 2 week stand down implemented.

Jase2985

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#2910075 4-May-2022 12:11

Gave my sample today to be tested

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#2910146 4-May-2022 15:05

networkn:

The problem is, the Doctor is the one who carries the can.

Personally, I'd like to see a mandatory 1-hour counselling session and a 2 week stand down implemented.

A counselling session and a cooling off period would be sensible, for someone who doesn't have kids. If you have kids and don't want more though - should be straight to booking.

Mike

elpenguino

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#2910170 4-May-2022 15:53

MikeAqua:

networkn:

The problem is, the Doctor is the one who carries the can.

Personally, I'd like to see a mandatory 1-hour counselling session and a 2 week stand down implemented.

A counselling session and a cooling off period would be sensible, for someone who doesn't have kids. If you have kids and don't want more though - should be straight to booking.

A counselling session for someone who does have kids is still sensible. You need to have thought about the consequences.

What if your child(ren) dies?

What if you remarry and your new partner wants kids of her own?

etc etc.

Most of the posters in this thread are just like chimpanzees on MDMA, full of feelings of bonhomie, joy, and optimism. Fred99 8/4/21

alasta

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#2910171 4-May-2022 15:59

There's also an age factor. A 25 year old without kids is in a different situation to a 45 year old without kids.

networkn

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#2910172 4-May-2022 16:01

elpenguino:

What if you remarry and your new partner wants kids of her own?

etc etc.

Yeah, the reason the first doctor I approached didn't want to give me a vasectomy was we had JUST had our second. He made a slightly indelicate comment about waiting a bit in case of the need of spare parts etc. It's not a nice thought, and he did explain it in more detail (core blood etc etc).

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