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79 posts

Master Geek
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Topic # 154828 9-Nov-2014 15:31
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November is birthday month for our families, this year my Sis's bday and her brothers b'day family dinners are being held on the same day and time. We can't attend both. I suggested for this odd time we attend our siblings bday separately to avoid disappointment for the others siblings dinner we couldn't attend.

We can't arrange to see either earlier in the day and due to the distance between the two (an hours drive we can't really attend both and would miss dinner and/or the cake at one).

Her argument is that we should be attending as couples and I agree but surely an odd compromise is fair enough?

Any thoughts, comments or solutions would be welcome!

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378 posts

Ultimate Geek
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  Reply # 1171681 9-Nov-2014 15:44
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Hah - tough one. I'd be voting for the split and attend family dinner each... come, on tho' bring in the geek - keep a Skype video call open... cardboard cut-out of each other... AI robot (maybe too late for a clone)...??




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Mike

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  Reply # 1171682 9-Nov-2014 15:44
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Well there is the traditional kiwi way to solving disagreements between couples.






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  Reply # 1171684 9-Nov-2014 15:52
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But since your going as a couple to your sis birthday whats the issue?




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Master Geek
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Reply # 1171686 9-Nov-2014 15:54
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Don't go to either and go to the pub as a couple.

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Ultimate Geek
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  Reply # 1171687 9-Nov-2014 16:12
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So no one thought to just celebrate both birthdays at the same location and just have one large dinner?




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Stefan Andres Charsley

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  Reply # 1171688 9-Nov-2014 16:20
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Go to the party that will be more fun, send apologies to the other and say "we feel obliged to go to (the other one) and we knew you'd understand".




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Master Geek
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  Reply # 1171691 9-Nov-2014 16:40
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Haha thanks for the replies guys, some are classic! Yeah is a hard one! It's a bit hard celebrating together as partners brother is only 12 and our familes have only met once since we've been together

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Ultimate Geek
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  Reply # 1171693 9-Nov-2014 16:44
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Sounds like you haven't been together THAT long, and if that's the case then neither family would care (or maybe even notice) that you haven't shown up as a couple.

I'd go with with your idea and just take the flak afterwards if she's still not on board.




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Stefan Andres Charsley

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  Reply # 1171701 9-Nov-2014 17:02
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Doesn't matter - you will either annoy person 1, person 2 or your girlfriend.

Which one would you prefer not to piss off?

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Ultimate Geek
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  Reply # 1171702 9-Nov-2014 17:04
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wasabi2k: Doesn't matter - you will either annoy person 1, person 2 or your girlfriend.

Which one would you prefer not to piss off?


Person 1 and person 2 :-P




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Stefan Andres Charsley

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  Reply # 1171703 9-Nov-2014 17:05
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charsleysa: Sounds like you haven't been together THAT long, and if that's the case then neither family would care (or maybe even notice) that you haven't shown up as a couple.

I'd go with with your idea and just take the flak afterwards if she's still not on board.


I agree. Actually, I'd take it further - if she insists on you both going as a couple then you both go to your Sis's birthday and send apologies for her brother's celebration. The choice is hers, she either goes with you or goes without you, and if she wants to make a big deal about it then perhaps the relationship isn't quite as much a couple as she thinks. Something this simple shouldn't be a cause for conflict. 

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  Reply # 1171722 9-Nov-2014 17:15
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You go to one this year, and the other the next. Same with Christmas. Pretty simple really.  

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  Reply # 1171726 9-Nov-2014 17:21
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This is a simple problem with a simple solution.... what is the main course and which host is likely to put on the best feed?!!



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  Reply # 1171732 9-Nov-2014 17:39
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Yeah not massively long bit over two years, been living together for a year. Yeah that's what I was frustrated about it's not a major problem and it had a simple solution for a one off, but she blew it out of proportion

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  Reply # 1171734 9-Nov-2014 17:59
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golfpunk111: November is birthday month for our families, this year my Sis's bday and her brothers b'day family dinners are being held on the same day and time. We can't attend both. I suggested for this odd time we attend our siblings bday separately to avoid disappointment for the others siblings dinner we couldn't attend.

We can't arrange to see either earlier in the day and due to the distance between the two (an hours drive we can't really attend both and would miss dinner and/or the cake at one).

Her argument is that we should be attending as couples and I agree but surely an odd compromise is fair enough?



I think it's a good compromise.




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