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Lock him up!
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# 201975 12-Sep-2016 15:08
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What did the lion tell his troubled friend? 

 

'Your problem is you have no pride.'

 

 

 

 





I don't think there is ever a bad time to talk about how absurd war is, how old men make decisions and young people die. - George Clooney
 


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# 1627933 12-Sep-2016 15:12
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At a wedding reception, the MC asks all the men in the room to please stand next to the person who makes their lives worth living.

 

Unfortunately the bar tender was crushed to death in the stampede.


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  # 1627992 12-Sep-2016 17:02
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"Donald Trump for president"

 

Gets me every time.






Sometimes what you don't get is a blessing in disguise!

 
 
 
 


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  # 1627993 12-Sep-2016 17:06
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DravidDavid:

 

"Donald Trump for president"

 

Gets me every time.

 

 

Unfortunately, sick jokes sometimes come true. ... frown





Sideface


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  # 1627995 12-Sep-2016 17:10
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If I think of one that won't 'offend' somebody, somewhere, I'll post it!






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  # 1627997 12-Sep-2016 17:16
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

 

The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.





Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding : Ice cream man , Ice cream man


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  # 1628001 12-Sep-2016 17:22
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What's red and invisible?

No tomatoes

 
 
 
 


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  # 1628023 12-Sep-2016 17:40
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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?

 

An investigator!


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  # 1628027 12-Sep-2016 17:47
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Stuff.co.nz






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  # 1628031 12-Sep-2016 17:52
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  # 1628032 12-Sep-2016 17:54
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Why did the Rooster cross the road? 

 

To prove he wasn't a chicken. 

 

 


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  # 1628039 12-Sep-2016 18:05
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Elephant stomping though the jungle comes upon a mouse

 

 

 

looking down the elephant says

 

 

 

"Why am I so big and you so small?"

 

 

 

looking up the mouse replied

 

 

 

"Ive not been well"

 

 


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  # 1628045 12-Sep-2016 18:12
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Two elephants fall off a cliff

 

 

 

Boom Boom!






Overarching undertones
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  # 1628072 12-Sep-2016 18:41
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What do you call a guy with two rabbits up his backside?

 

Warren.

 

What do you call a guy with a spade jammed in his head?

 

Doug.


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  # 1628073 12-Sep-2016 18:44
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Geektastic:

 

If I think of one that won't 'offend' somebody, somewhere, I'll post it!

 

You could be Donald for a post! 


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