Muriwai Beach tragedy, and putting an old head on young drivers shoulders

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Dynamic

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#311506 22-Jan-2024 12:46

How do you put an old head on young drivers shoulders?

When I was in my 6th form year at college in the early 1990's, one of the most popular girls in my year at school did not show up one Monday. There were lots of whispers but it took a few days to confirm that she was in a vegetative state after the car she and some teenage boys were driving in around the streets failed to take a bend and hit a concrete retaining wall.

In my late teens some of the guys and I went into town to get breakfast for those nursing sore heads the morning after a 19th birthday party. The driver took a detour along a very wide and well maintained rural metal road dug into the side of a steep hill. The three passengers including myself decided to window surf while he was drifting. When he lost control, a fortuitous fencepost was the only thing that stopped the car going down the side of the very steep hill.

In my early 20's a mate and I both bought and fixed up a pair of old farm quad bikes. We took them and our dogs and girlfriends to a spot at the far end of Muriwai Beach where nobody else could see or hear us and were having a grand old time having races and doing donuts. During a victory donut one of my back wheels dug in and this pretty heavy farm quad with a full set of steel bars (but not a roll cage) high-sided me and rolled one and a half times, stopping less than an arms length from me.

Looking back, I consider myself a pretty decent teenager. Hardly drank. No drugs. Was rarely heavy with my right foot when driving. Didn't give my parents much trouble. I still ended up in at least two situations that could have ended with significant injury or death in vehicles. If as a teenager the car I was in had gone down the side of that steep hill, would people reading about it in the newspaper have felt sad for my family, or figured I was a problem child and probably had it coming?

On Sunday the 21st of January 2024, a young driver was doing donuts on Muriwai Beach in a 4wd vehicle. Like my stories above, he was likely out having a bit of harmless fun and everyone expected to go home at the end of the day. When one of the wheels dug in, the vehicle rolled and one of his mates was killed. The drivers is going to have to live with that for their rest of their lives. The mate's family is going to have to live with the loss of their granddaughter/daughter/niece/sister for the rest of their lives. I have a daughter around that age. Reading the story gave me chills.

We want them to get home safely. We want their friends to get home safely. We want those around them to get home safely. Again, how do you put an old head on young drivers shoulders?

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pdh

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#3185169 22-Jan-2024 14:05

My deepest sympathies to both these families - and all the others bereft by the tragedies of immaturity.

My many decades of navigating risks suggest only three solutions:

(1) accept that wishful thinking serves no purpose- and just accept the toll of death & injury that accompanies the transition of protected child to mature adult. Homo Sapiens development seems to have decided that risky behaviour in the adolescent has benefits that outweigh the downside. Default condition for humanity.

(2) take a Singapore-like approach to strong punishment for transgressions of approved behaviour. Singapore doesn't do hooning in cars / street-racing, gangs, drugs, rape... it doesn't even do chewing gum or jay-walking. Credit the rattan or pretend that the population is so genetically unique that (1) doesn't apply. Notice that while I admire the results - I don't choose to live there...

(3) implement an education campaign from middle-school onwards - risk-assessment & risk-mitigation with graphic films, pain experience, exercises to sear into young minds real-world unrecoverability vs game re-boots. All the modern tools of a propaganda campaign. I've seen this work (in NZ) to change societal tolerance of - and practice of - drink driving. It might also kill kayaking, rafting, mountain-biking, casual hook-ups and lots of other fun stuff - but it might, somewhat, prematurely age/mature those young heads.

What we'll probably do is ban all vehicles on beaches - or 4-wheel drives - or quad bikes; in an attempt to feel good that we've 'done something' to reduce unhappiness (so often at the cost of reducing happiness).

gzt

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#3185172 22-Jan-2024 14:23

Tragedy. Seeing the article this morning my instant reaction was if you haven't got a good reason to have a vehicle on Muriwai Beach then you should not be on the beach with a vehicle.

Leave it for the birds, penguins and seals and the people who look after it. You don't need to be there.

boosacnoodle

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#3185176 22-Jan-2024 14:33

This is going to sound a bit blunt but ... you didn't know that window surfing was dangerous? You also mentioned going to "Muriwai Beach where nobody else could see or hear us". Tthis suggests you knew that there was something to hide there too.

Vehicles are, oftentimes, multi-ton metal machines and arguably some of the most dangerous machinery that many of us will operate in our lifetimes. But, some people decide to treat them like, as you said, "a bit of harmless fun".

I don't think anyone could really have stopped the two events you described. Ultimately, driving education needs a massive overhaul.

Dynamic

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#3185180 22-Jan-2024 15:04

boosacnoodle:

This is going to sound a bit blunt but ... you didn't know that window surfing was dangerous? You also mentioned going to "Muriwai Beach where nobody else could see or hear us". Tthis suggests you knew that there was something to hide there too.

Vehicles are, oftentimes, multi-ton metal machines and arguably some of the most dangerous machinery that many of us will operate in our lifetimes. But, some people decide to treat them like, as you said, "a bit of harmless fun".

I don't think anyone could really have stopped the two events you described. Ultimately, driving education needs a massive overhaul.

Adult me knows that window surfing is madness. Teenage me saw two mates doing it and thinking I'll have a go as well.

My mate was/is a member of a reputable and responsible 4WD club. We went to an area on the beach far far away from others so we could be a little silly with the quads without bothering anyone with our noise or antics, rather than hiding the activity.

Driving on beaches is something that family members and others I know have done responsibly for as far back as I remember, whether for a quiet spot of fishing or a family swim and picnic away from the crowds. I've never seen or heard of any of them speeding, doing donuts, or otherwise acting irresponsibly on a beach. I would not like to see that activity banned if it is a minority causing issues.

We use cars every day and become complacent about hurtling along in a multi-ton machine as you say. With that sort of weight/momentum/force, when things go wrong they can go very wrong very quickly.

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decibel

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#3185182 22-Jan-2024 15:16

Dynamic:

How do you put an old head on young drivers shoulders?

You can't. Always amazes me seeing some distraught parent "warning other's of their child's mistakes" when their child took no notices of others.

We won't learn from history so we are doomed to repeat it.

blackjack17

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#3185234 22-Jan-2024 15:40

Cars are seen as a right rather than a privilege.

We don't enforce the rules we have.

I bike to work, a good quarter of drivers are on their phones, the traffic lights outside my children's school are so bad that I have had to teach my children to wait when they get the green pedestrian crossing due to the number of redlight runners, including heavy truck and trailer units, speeding, excessive acceleration, excessive noise, pulling out of driveways without checking the footpath. My students think nothing of driving with passengers while on their restricted. Cars with headlights not working. Parking. I feel like an old man shaking my fist at clouds but why aren't we enforcing this stuff!

Driving rules are simply not enforced and so people simple ignore them and don't treat cars with the respect that they need to as they can very easily kill people.

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Behodar

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#3185235 22-Jan-2024 15:46

blackjack17:

We don't enforce the rules we have.

And we don't test. I haven't been required to do a test (theory or practice) since I was a teenager. I'm in my 40s now.

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snj

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#3185236 22-Jan-2024 15:48

gzt: Tragedy. Seeing the article this morning my instant reaction was if you haven't got a good reason to have a vehicle on Muriwai Beach then you should not be on the beach with a vehicle.

Leave it for the birds, penguins and seals and the people who look after it. You don't need to be there.

As someone that lives kinda near it, and grew up going to the beach regularly (Nippers/etc) and school trips for beach days, dune protection and so on, I could never see the need for vehicles on the beach, so I wholeheartedly agree.

I was speaking to my mum this morning about this incident, and how the council had just reopened the beach to vehicles (apparently they've introduced bans during high beach usage periods, which just ended it seems), she was rather blunt with a "They shouldn't be there, the number of times vehicles have damaged the sand dunes...". For that reason alone it should be limited to the surf club/lifeguards, and emergency services (although even the Police recently proved they aren't always good on the beaches...), and the odd legitimate use for boats/etc.

In other words, the vehicle use permits should be purely based on overwhelming need to be on the beach.

sen8or

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#3185237 22-Jan-2024 15:54

Teenage boys simply do not have the brain chemistry / neurological pathways to connect actions and potential consequence, they don't develop this until their 20s. Education, training and even a little bit of fear may help a small few (heck, even maybe the majority), but to quote Forrest Gump "stupid is as stupid does".

It took some close family friends being killed by a drunk driver when I was in my mid teens (16-17) to really bring home just how dangerous cars could be.

BlakJak

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#3185247 22-Jan-2024 16:26

I was relatively late to the party from a driving perspective. Got my learners at age 18.

Made the mistakes at age 19 and 20 that my classmates had been making at ages 17 and 18.... so despite the best intentions my mother had ("you're not driving, it's too dangerous!" was the stock line until I turned 18, left school, and basically it ceased to be something she could stop me doing + I had the financial means to afford a car by then)... I got 'stuck in'.

I had two accidents during my 20th year. One of them involved a court appearance.

And i'm just about as straight as they come... as those who know me, will attest ;)

But talk about lessons. My experiences, both behind the wheel and with 'the system' afterward, tempered me and have made me a far better, far more considerate, motorist, in the decades since.

(For many years, i'd still involuntarily shudder when recalling some of what I was stupidly lucky to get away with).

Bottom line: Sometimes you need to learn the lessons the hard way to have them 'bed in'. The trick is to hopefully leave at least one or two 'safety layers' left even as you unpick / disregard the ones that would otherwise get in your way.

I would argue that riding in the tray of a 'hooning' ute doesn't leave enough margin for error, so even making allowances for the need to learn some lessons, poor call.

I see they're now calling for vehicle access on the beach to be banned. This is why we can't have nice things. :(

And even when you ban it, people will ignore the rule.

No signature to see here, move along...

networkn

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#3185251 22-Jan-2024 16:31

Dynamic:

How do you put an old head on young drivers shoulders?

When I was in my 6th form year at college in the early 1990's, one of the most popular girls in my year at school did not show up one Monday. There were lots of whispers but it took a few days to confirm that she was in a vegetative state after the car she and some teenage boys were driving in around the streets failed to take a bend and hit a concrete retaining wall.

In my late teens some of the guys and I went into town to get breakfast for those nursing sore heads the morning after a 19th birthday party. The driver took a detour along a very wide and well maintained rural metal road dug into the side of a steep hill. The three passengers including myself decided to window surf while he was drifting. When he lost control, a fortuitous fencepost was the only thing that stopped the car going down the side of the very steep hill.

In my early 20's a mate and I both bought and fixed up a pair of old farm quad bikes. We took them and our dogs and girlfriends to a spot at the far end of Muriwai Beach where nobody else could see or hear us and were having a grand old time having races and doing donuts. During a victory donut one of my back wheels dug in and this pretty heavy farm quad with a full set of steel bars (but not a roll cage) high-sided me and rolled one and a half times, stopping less than an arms length from me.

Looking back, I consider myself a pretty decent teenager. Hardly drank. No drugs. Was rarely heavy with my right foot when driving. Didn't give my parents much trouble. I still ended up in at least two situations that could have ended with significant injury or death in vehicles. If as a teenager the car I was in had gone down the side of that steep hill, would people reading about it in the newspaper have felt sad for my family, or figured I was a problem child and probably had it coming?

On Sunday the 21st of January 2024, a young driver was doing donuts on Muriwai Beach in a 4wd vehicle. Like my stories above, he was likely out having a bit of harmless fun and everyone expected to go home at the end of the day. When one of the wheels dug in, the vehicle rolled and one of his mates was killed. The drivers is going to have to live with that for their rest of their lives. The mate's family is going to have to live with the loss of their granddaughter/daughter/niece/sister for the rest of their lives. I have a daughter around that age. Reading the story gave me chills.

We want them to get home safely. We want their friends to get home safely. We want those around them to get home safely. Again, how do you put an old head on young drivers shoulders?

I'll be FOREVER grateful for one of my friends parents who made their basement (also said friends brothers bedroom) available to myself and my group of friends. We were allowed to drink (though I never did), weren't allowed in any room with a closing door alone with a person of the opposite sex, and were provided food regular to help soak up any alcohol that was consumed and keep us fairly sober, along with occasional regular visits by the upstairs adults to ensure people were behaving appropriately. No driving too or from the party unless you were 100% sober was allowed, parents were notified as we left etc. They also rented us movies each evening we were there, as this was a nice safe way to keep us entertained.

All of my group of friends survived high school and our late teens, after which I lost contact with most of them.

The whole thing must have cost my friends parents a fortune, and to my knowledge no payment was ever offered nor received for said act of generosity.

At the time I never appreciated what a massive gift that was, and it's something I'd like to be able to provide in some way for my kids friends as they grow up.

I wish I had understood and appreciated it more. Like @dynamic I was a pretty well behaved teenager, never really giving my mother much reason to question my morals or whereabouts, though I am fairly sure, despite that, I was at least fairly responsible for her grey hair.

Bung

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#3185252 22-Jan-2024 16:32

Dynamic: Driving on beaches is something that family members and others I know have done responsibly for as far back as I remember, whether for a quiet spot of fishing or a family swim and picnic away from the crowds. I've never seen or heard of any of them speeding, doing donuts, or otherwise acting irresponsibly on a beach. I would not like to see that activity banned if it is a minority causing issues.

We use cars every day and become complacent about hurtling along in a multi-ton machine as you say. With that sort of weight/momentum/force, when things go wrong they can go very wrong very quickly.

i live at Foxton Beach. The beach up to the high tide mark is designated as a road with a speed limit of 30km/h. All the usual requirements about vehicles being registered, warranted and drivers licensed apply. All regularly ignored. Almost every day there are FWD idiots in the sand dunes, wannabe Bert Munros on competion MX bikes and cars doing donuts at low tide. This tragedy may help remind some of our local police force that people that report this aren't just being Karens. To be fair when they do stir themselves into action they only have a Toyota ute with road tyres so it's not too hard to evade them.

johno1234

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#3185265 22-Jan-2024 16:52

Great post, @Dynamic

I would consider myself more sensible than the NZ average and was well brought up by sensible parents, yet I still did absolutely stupid things when I was in my teens. It makes me shudder to think about it.

I am certain that my kids, all now in their late teens or early 20s are much more sensible than I was. However my parents probably thought the same thing about me.

eracode

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#3185310 22-Jan-2024 21:12

gzt: Tragedy. Seeing the article this morning my instant reaction was if you haven't got a good reason to have a vehicle on Muriwai Beach then you should not be on the beach with a vehicle.

Leave it for the birds, penguins and seals and the people who look after it. You don't need to be there.

Yes - going there to hoon around and do donuts is not a ‘good reason’. But serious question - what about fishing? So if fishers are good to go, how do you distinguish between groups with differing plans?

Sometimes I just sit and think. Other times I just sit.